WHY HAVING A BABY SHOWER AFTER THE BABY IS BORN IS BECOMING THE NORM

Meet and Greet Baby Shower, After Baby Shower, Meet the Baby Party, Post-Baby Shower, Welcome Baby Shower, and a Sip and See Party are all different names for a baby shower AFTER the baby is born. And they’re SO much more fun (and make a lot more sense!) than the traditional baby shower that it’s no wonder why more and more parents are choosing to wait.

Having a baby shower after the baby is born is very similar to the traditional baby shower in many ways. There can still be games, and cake, and gifts. You definitely won’t feel like you’re missing out on anything! Believe me, I’ve had two of my own! If anything, it’ll make you realize that the traditional baby showers are actually the ones missing out.

So, why are so many parents deciding to have an after-baby-baby-shower, and what makes it so much better?

Here are 8 reasons why:

1. A Traditional Baby Shower can be a Guessing Game for Your Guests When They Buy Gifts

Babies who are born full term can vary greatly in size from five to ten pounds. That makes a BIG difference when it comes to your guests buying you baby clothes. Most people will buy the “Newborn” size, but some babies will be born bigger and they will only fit in size “1-3 months”, meaning the “newborn” sized clothing goes unused.

Additionally, some parents want to wait until the birth to find out the gender, which forces gifts to be gender neutral. Gender neutral is great, but it may make shopping a little more difficult for your guests.

These unknowns before a baby is born, leaves gift buying full of assumptions.

2. The Gender may be Incorrect

Even in this day and age with the advancements in genetic testing and ultrasound technology, I’m sorry to report that this still happens and I’ve seen it more than once first hand.

Imagine having your baby shower for your baby girl, and then one week later the 4D ultrasound at 38 weeks sees a “turtle head”, and confirms that you’re actually having a boy.

SURPRISE!

Or, you don’t even find out that the gender was incorrect until you give birth, and you’re left wondering if you should return all of the girly gifts to the guests, or if you should just dress your boy in pink for the first several months.

Both options are a little awkward.

At the end of the day there’s really no harm done, and at the very least it’s a funny story, but planning to have your baby shower after the baby is born would’ve prevented the waste of all of those gender specific gifts, and would’ve saved you some embarrassment.

3. Dads and Partners are not Only Invited to an After Baby Shower, They’re Celebrated too

The traditional baby shower is such a girls’ club. And I’m not dissin’ it when I say that. An all female shower is super fun and full of female bonding!

But, a baby shower that happens after a baby is born can be more family-oriented. It can celebrate the father or the partner, in addition to the mother and baby.

And anyone the parents deem to be important in their lives, be it friends or family and/or co-workers, may be invited…whether they’re male or female.

In my profession as a postpartum nurse, caring for the family as a whole is very important. I would never just congratulate the mother on the birth of the baby. I would also congratulate the father or the partner. Similarly, I would not only teach the mother how to swaddle the baby or do skin-to-skin, I’d teach the father or partner as well. Parenting should be 50/50.

So, I love that baby showers after the baby is born not only include the dad and partner, but can also celebrate them as well. What a wonderful, all inclusive celebration that focuses on congratulating the family as a whole.

4. Skip the Traditional Baby Shower if you Don’t Like Being the Center of Attention

Traditional baby showers should be renamed “mom showers”, and after-baby-baby-showers should be called “baby showers”.

While most of the gifts at a traditional baby shower are for baby, the mother is the real star of the show, and all eyes are on them. The thought of being the center of attention made me feel a little uncomfortable, which is why I preferred an after-baby-baby-shower where the spotlight was more on my baby, not me.

5. Your Baby May be Born BEFORE the Traditional Baby Shower

Traditional baby showers are usually planned to happen 4-6 weeks before the due date. But, guess what?

Your baby may have other plans.

Most women expect to deliver full term at 37-40 weeks, but often babies will be born earlier. I have cared for so many mothers whose baby is born premature and they were forced to cancel their baby shower.

Why not simply take away that disappointment and just plan from the beginning to celebrate baby after they’re born?

Given the choice, people would much rather go to a party where they get to meet the baby anyways!

6. Friends and Family can Meet Baby all at Once Instead of Bombarding you in the Hospital or Straggling in for Home Visits

If your friends, family, and co-workers know that there will be a baby shower after the baby is born, they’re less likely to try to visit you in the hospital or stop by your house on short notice.

A new baby is such an exciting thing, and people will come out of the woodwork to see them. But, there’s a time and a place for it, and it’s definitely not when you’re in pain or cluster feeding in the hospital, or when your doorbell rings at home when you haven’t taken a shower in two days or when you’re pumping.

It’s SO much nicer to have a specific day and time that everyone can come meet the baby!

7. Your Gifts May be More Personalized

Not like you’re supposed to care so much about the gifts…but, it is nice when gifts are more personalized. If people already know the baby’s gender, name, date and time of birth, even the weight and height, your gifts may be more personalized.

What’s my most cherished baby gift?

It was a Christmas ornament from potterybarn.com that has my son’s name, date and time of birth, and weight and height engraved in a wooden baby block.

I love that I get to “re-enjoy” it every year.

I loved it so much that I ordered ones for my other sons. And I swear, I’ve been reminded of my youngest son’s time of birth and birth measurements more than once thanks to that ornament!

(Please don’t judge until you have three or more children! You feel me?!)

8. Postpartum can be Lonely and Isolating, so a Party May Help

Seeing people who love and who care about you after you’ve had your baby may help you get out of your postpartum funk, or at the very least, lift your spirits.

If you’re really in the thick of it, you may feel like a party is the last thing you want, just read my post here about hard postpartum can be, but listen to me...

JUST DO IT.

(Insert Nike Swoosh logo here)

Spit up stained clothes and un-manicured nails and all…just throw yourself into it.

There’s nothing to lose, only to gain in the mental health department.

Research has proven that just by smiling (fake or real) helps improve our mood and increases our happiness.

So, I encourage you to follow the lead of so many other parents, including myself, and plan your baby shower after your baby is born.

Hopefully you’ll agree with me, and most other parents, that it’s the best way to go.

Related Questions About Having Your Baby Shower AFTER Your Baby is Born

Who hosts the Baby Shower After the Baby is Born?

It can be anyone! Often it’s the parents themselves, but one of mine was planned by a co-worker and was thrown at her house. My other party was put together by my mom’s side of the family. We all met up at Olive Garden in their party room. Both of them were equally fun!

There’s really no one way to do it!

You could have it at your house, at someone else’s house, at a restaurant, at a park, at the beach, etc!

I recently went to an after baby shower at a neighborhood park and it was SO much fun!

A couple of tables were set up with a potluck and the adults ate and drank and pawned over baby while the older children played with each other on the playground. It was fun and short and sweet! And nobody had to clean their house to make it happen!

What kind of food is served at an After-Baby-Baby Shower?

Any kind you want! You could do appetizers only like chips and dip, vegetable platter, and some cookies. Or you could do a potluck where each guest brings something to eat, which is always fun!

You could also order pizza and salad. Or if you have a bigger budget you could have the party catered. That way, you can focus more on visiting with your guests than worrying about the food and the clean up!

However, a potluck yields the same benefits and it’s much more budget friendly!

When should you have a baby shower after baby is born?

It may be best to wait a couple of months until the mother has recovered from childbirth and is not in pain anymore.

In addition, your baby’s immune system is not fully developed until 2-3 months. So, that’s when it’s most recommended to have your baby shower.

My first son’s baby shower was when he was one month old, and my other son’s was at three months old…

but, they were both born in the summer.

If you’re having your shower during the flu season (typically October-April), you should set up a hand sanitizer station at your front door. Make it clear to your guests, even on the invitation, to please refrain from attending if they have any signs or symptoms of being sick.

Also, make a “no kissing baby” rule. All reasonable people should be understanding!

To Sum Things Up…

I hope these 8 reasons have convinced you why having a baby shower AFTER a baby is born is becoming the norm!

I’m curious to hear down in the comments what you think a baby shower AFTER a baby is born should be called:

• Meet and Greet Baby Shower
• After Baby Shower
• Meet the Baby Shower
• Post-Baby Shower
• Welcome Baby Shower
• Hello Baby Shower
• Sip and See Party
• After-Baby-Baby-Shower

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Disclaimer:
The content that I share on Purely Postpartum is not intended nor recommended as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. I encourage you to always seek the advice of your own physician or other qualified health care professional regarding any medical questions or conditions.